Wednesday, August 07, 2019

Finding Your Voice

Finding your voice

When I left a corporate job a few years ago to begin consulting, I imagined the difficulties I would face alone out there in the ‘real world’. I was excited and scared – they actually feel pretty similar. In looking back, I had much to learn both about what I loved when working by myself, and what I missed when I left that organization.

A few years later, I spoke to a top executive about this change and he asked me what part of it had been the most difficult. Now, a lot of things are difficult when moving from a world where you are a part of a powerful whole… to being the completely responsible whole. Some things are tactical – I have to book my own meetings, organize my own schedule, make my own sales calls. Some are more strategic – deciding what to work on, what my vision for my business (and therefore myself) is, and how I most want to serve my clients.

My answer to his question was this: the hardest part of being out on my own was finding my own voice.

I was exceptionally good at writing and speaking in the voice of the organization, about organizational goals and considerations and risk mitigation. Now I had to decide how I wanted to speak for myself. I thought it would be easy. After all, I had spent some time (usually on those days when things at work were not going my way) dreaming of all the ways I was going to be speaking my own truth when I was no longer bound by an organization.

I forgot to consider that there is a comfort in writing (and working) together with others. There is an ease in knowing you do not carry the entirety of the end product by yourself. And there is a comfort to knowing that no matter how complex a file, someone else will help (through potentially innumerable rounds of edits and re-writes) to find clarity and share the responsibility for what ends up being created. The freedom of creating my own work without that support structure suddenly felt daunting rather than freeing.

So I did what I have done with other things that are important but scary. I put off writing and speaking in favor or other business work. Now, that other work was also important but I had a voice in my head and heart that wanted out and I wasn’t having any of it… because I wasn’t sure of it or what it wanted to say.

I wish I could tell you that I had a sudden AHA moment when my purpose and vision and voice all aligned and clarity came easily. Unfortunately, that was not how it happened. What I discovered was both encouraging (because it was within my control) and discouraging (because it was going to take work). Finding your voice takes practice. What I needed to do to find my writing ‘voice’ was , simply put, to write. What I needed to do to find my speaking voice was similarly obvious - to speak. And I needed to do this before I was completely clear or ready or completely sure of myself.

Because my voice just would not reveal itself unless I used it.

I’m still working on both the practice of uncovering my voice and my truth and putting it out there for the world to see. It is a scary feeling pretty much every single time. It is an ongoing process. It takes courage to publish something that I take full responsibility for. It is difficult. And yet… it also feels like I am getting closer with every piece I put out there – closer to myself and hopefully… closer to connecting with you.

So as I go on, I look forward to continuing the work of finding my voice – and hoping to connect with you and your voice.

Tuesday, January 15, 2019

Reconnecting and re-engaging with work IS reconnecting to life

I hear from a lot of people who are disconnected and unengaged with their work. If you're one of them, you have a whole lot of company! According to a 2016 survey of 2500 employers and employees reported in the Canadian HR Reporter, almost half of professionals are unhappy in their jobs.

Finding your path

"one half of working population unhappy in job" - hrreporter.com

The study points to "right fit" as a reason for this. Unfortunately, at least in the study, most employers and employees did not really seem able to define "right fit". To me, what is interesting is that the reason people are unhappy, or even leave an organization, seem to have to do with things beyond salary and benefits.

Interestingly, when I speak with people around me who are not engaged in, or downright unhappy about work, they typically have a good number of reasons about why it is so. These reasons are often reasonable and compelling. There are stories about nasty bosses and poorly outlined work expectations, about lack of flexibility in working hours and locations, there are stories about constantly changing deadlines and micromanaging supervisors, there are even stories about truly horrible, mean senior management and work objectives that don’t seem to be rooted in any kind of overall vision.

So yes, I get it. Work can suck and sometimes it seems like the easiest and best solution to keep collecting that pay and keep going into the office (or more likely the cubicle) while doing the bare minimum and certainly emotionally disengaging because otherwise it just would not be sustainable or survivable.

I get it.

I understand.

I’ve been there.

And all of those reasons just do not matter.

Ouch.

They don’t matter unless you can change them and chances are you would have already changed them if you could have, right?

The problem is that by disengaging with your work, by no longer caring, you are actually throwing away large chunks of your life. Your life. Not your boss’s, your co-workers, your executive team’s. And to me, that’s a problem.

When I have been in there, I ended up realizing that I no longer wanted to give the situations and/or people who were making me unhappy the power to continue to do so. Was changing the situation easy? NO! Did I find a solution I could make work quickly? NO!

What I did do, and what a number of clients and friends have done is to recognize, at the very least, that I first needed to take back my power. This led to thinking about how I might do it. First though, came the decision to at least consider doing something. THAT was the major piece. The DECISION to do something about the situation that wasn’t going my way.

What did I do? A number of things. I decided to reconnect with the pieces of work that made sense to me and the overall reason that I had wanted to be in the job in the first place. I also furthered my learning and considered my potential exit strategies. Looking critically at my situation helped me immediately, even though in my case, I ended up deciding to leave.

There is nothing quite like updating a resume to begin feeling like you are taking back some power – even if you never send it out, and if you do, well before you get an offer. I also lined up support – family and friends I could trust with the challenges I was facing and the decisions I was making, acquaintances in other parts of the larger organization and beyond who might have a different view than mine and so provided a solid sounding board without any bias, a fantastic coach who worked with me as I worked through all the things I could do to re-engage with work, whether it be in the current job or future work.

Work won’t always be fun. It should be something you can engage in wholeheartedly at least most of the time. It should align with our most important values. It should allow us to feel that we are contributing to something bigger than ourselves, be it in the management of a team, the resolution of a problem, the completion of a project, the service to a client. If that isn’t currently the case, I would invite you consider that you can still engage with at least parts of your work, thereby being engaged in more of your life. Even if you end up leaving your current job for a new challenge.

The question I will leave you with is … what can you start doing today to re-engage in a major part of your life, namely your work, and feel more fulfilled and alive?

Posted by Sigrid S at 3:21 PM
Edited on: Wednesday, January 16, 2019 5:09 PM
Categories: Career, Intentional Living, Pockets of Joy, Success Practices, Work

Wednesday, December 19, 2018

What you practice expands

What you practice expands into other parts of your life - from creative efforts, to health and diet to success at work.

coffee cup in hands

Last July, on my birthday, I decided to commit to an art practice. I decided to paint every day for 108 days. I’m still not sure what drove me to make this promise to myself, but I did. I kept it loose – even holding a paintbrush, picking up some paint and depositing it on ‘something’ (because I paint just about anything I can get my hands on this ‘something’ could be a canvas, some paper, a piece of furniture, some garden tools). I wanted to keep it light, with the focus on the practice instead of results.

What happened? Did I paint absolutely every day? No. I painted almost every day thought. And I approached painting differently. And as I painted more, my painting changed and morphed and became something I had not anticipated, both in terms of content (what I paint has shifted, much to my surprise), but also in terms of feelings associated with painting. Gone (mostly lol) is the heaviness that I felt when I approached painting thinking I needed to produce something of value. Now I can paint for 5 minutes and count it as a win. Often, I paint for longer, but the win happens in very little time… the rest is just a bonus.

Something else also happened though, something pretty cool and momentous. The discipline of painting daily bled into other areas of my life. I found myself making other life changes. I changed the way I eat and it was easier than ever. I started writing more. I added steps to my day… lots of them. Why did this happen? Now I’m not totally sure but I think when I started feeling successful every day, I started feeling more equipped to take on other challenges. After all, I was already proving I could do something that I considered challenging. The key, for me, is to make success super duper easy. I have a tendency to want to jump into something pretty extreme with impossibly tight deadlines and then revel in the adrenaline rush… while it lasts (which typically is not all that long). This is looser, easier, although not always fun it is more often fun! It runs completely counter to my usual approach but it is working. More than three months in, what have I learned?

Everything changes when you practice. The work changes and YOU change… in ways that you would not be able to predict when you started. Maybe you want to join me in picking something you want to move forward on and pick the tiniest daily step you can possibly imagine… and then commit to a practice… and recognize your wins. Can’t wait to hear what you choose! And if you want some support and companionship along the way, perhaps we can walk this bit together!

Posted by Sigrid S at 1:46 PM
Edited on: Wednesday, January 16, 2019 5:10 PM
Categories: Career, Creative Living, Intentional Living, Mindfullness, Success Practices, Whole Life, Work